Fake Samuel

Sorry its been a while. I've been in rehab and you know how they're all no-outside-contact-until-we -remake-who-you-are. Whatever. I went to their classes, I meditated on the new swiffer-sniffer free me, I met with the addiction specialists, I went to the group sessions. I got through it all. What a waste. I think The Folks read my last post and saw a good way to get rid of me for a few weeks. They like to play Wii at the Grandparent's house. I'm happy to let them do it too, but they feel the need to police me 24/7. I've been working on standing alone and walking (haven't shown 'em that yet), and as so as I get it down I'm so out of here. On the other hand, Christmas was good. So far I got a few more books to read, a ton of cars to push around and a big truck thingie that makes a ton of noise - it really bugs The Folks. And I still have another Grandparent to go. She's good for something noisy I'll wager. I hope it can go in my crib

So apparently The Father has been uploading videos on his blog and only now finding out that a majority of them are so dark it looks like a couple of blobs dancing to kid's music. Serves him right - trying to exploit me for profit on the Internet. And the yahoos reading his blog didn't have the sense to say "hey these videos BLOW do something about it dorko." Idiots. UPDATE: I've just been informed that this same problem *might* have afflicted my previous posting of the horror mini-series that I'm acting in. That this problem could be a generalized error and not something simply limited to the stupidity of The Father is a small chance to be sure, but rest assured I will find the people responsible and have them shot.

The Folks are on my back like 24/7. I can't get a moment to myself. So sometimes, when they finally leave me alone for 2 seconds, I get up and walk around. Yea I've been walking for sometime now. I keep it on the down-low. As long as they still think I'm crawling they don't lock up the cleaning supplies. And I kind of have a swiffer habit. Not the mopping kind. The dusting pads. I sniff them. Kinda gives me a buzz. I think. Anyhoo its no big deal - its under control. The problem is, I forget that The Folks don't know about the ambulation thing. So sometimes, when they deny things that are clearly mine, or when I feel my personal liberties are being infringed upon, my sense of righteous indignation rises up and I decide to run to the closet, grab a swiffer pad and drown my sorrows in Lemon Pine scent. Or Citrus, by Everyday Living. Store brand. Not as good. Anyway as soon as I realize that I'm about to take off running, I remember that I'm ju